Celebrity? Bollocks!

Hey you, yeah that's right, you falling out of a hired car outside a packed movie premier in oh so trendy Soho... yeah you who is famous simply for going out with someone who actually is famous and you let him film you having sex and then it somehow got "stolen" and put on the internet... you're no fucking celebrity, get back to nursing you charleton!

God I hate this new breed of person who thinks that simply being associated with someone famous or appearing on a third rate reality TV show makes them somehow interesting to the general public.

Take that Abi Titmus bint, for example, who as I may have mentioned is only really famous because she happened to go out with John Leslie once and has since revealed herself (literally) to be a dirty tart who likes to get her kit off. What was that stupid tour all about just to promote her calendar? What a waste of time and effort, no wonder hospitals are riddled with MRSA, all the nurses are fucking off to have careers as "models" and "celebrities".

Wouldn't it be better if celebrity types gave up their jobs and got regular jobs like the rest of us. Imagine being served by Jonathon Ross in McDonalds (which frankly might not be too far away) or being treated for lime disease by former nurse Abi Titmus... although come to think about it I have no idea where her hands have been.

And Celebrity Big Brother? Don't get me started on that bunch of Z listers. Kenzie from Blazing Squad? Lisa I'Anson? Bridgete fucking-Nielsson? Puh-lease! Someone should fill the Big Brother house with all these psuedo-celebs and put petrol and matches to good use.

Oh, currently on my ipod is Goldie Looking Chain and they rocks. You fucking knows it, clart!